Woman’s Call to Vocation: Homemaking

Contrary to the modern world’s ideals, women are uniquely suited for homemaking and homebuilding. We must embrace our role as “heroic women” – as John Paul II has referred to mothers at home – and deny the wisdom of the world that tells us we should be out DOing something USEful. We are building a home, raising children to be saints…so what’s home “making” all about?

Themes

• False Wisdom of the World
• Homebuilding is a Ministry
• What are Women Called to Do at Home?

I see a lot of references to and resources for “homebuilding” and godly homemaking in the Christian (non-Catholic) world, and I’m going to borrow heavily from them. The following is a synopsis of a talk by Christian minister Mark Driscoll at Mars Hill Church. You can find the complete talk on the Internet here (Link no longer available).

What Does the World Teach Us?

False wisdom of the world:

• Humans are highest being that there is (individuals are most important)
• Pride is highest virtue (“If you’re not doing well, you need more self-esteem.”)
• We need autonomy, independence and self-reliance
• Self-fulfillment is defined by the individual and is the greatest goal for each of us.
• We achieve this through freedom (i.e. “we can do whatever we want”).
• Marketplace is the key to happiness.
• Other people exist so that you can consume from them.

God says exactly the opposite:

• Community is most important.
• Humility is the highest virtue.
• The greatest goal/value in life is to love God and love each other as result of loving God – not self-fulfilled, but loved.
• Freedom means being connected to each other and to God (we don’t do well in isolation).
• The home is where ministry – interdependence – life – happens for a woman.
• Other people exist so that we can participate with them in life and be like Jesus to serve them.

The minister teaches that we need to free ourselves from letting “housewife” be a denigrating term. We should appreciate that “housewife” and “homebuilding” are synonyms to “minister” and “ministry”. The Scriptures speak of “home” as a valuable place:

• Jesus refers to the temple as “my house” in Matthew 21:13, and the Church as “the household of God” in Ephesians 2:19.
• In 1 Corinthians, St. Paul describes our bodies as the temple of the Holy Spirit and otherwise the “house of God”
• Heaven is often referred to in Scripture, tradition and songs as “the Father’s House”

Therefore “home” is place where God and his people dwell together. Home is a good place to be.

I love that! Let us embrace the ministry of the home and seek to pray about and for our ministries. Let us continue to learn what God asks of us as women in the home.

1. How can you make your “home” a household where God is pleased to dwell?

Who Builds the Home?

Titus, Chapter 2

1 As for yourself, you must say what is consistent with sound doctrine, namely, 2 that older men should be temperate, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, love, and endurance.3 Similarly, older women should be reverent in their behavior, not slanderers, not addicted to drink, teaching what is good, 4 so that they may train younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled, chaste, good homemakers, under the control of their husbands, so that the word of God may not be discredited. 6 Urge the younger men, similarly, to control themselves, 7 showing yourself as a model of good deeds in every respect, with integrity in your teaching, dignity, 8 and sound speech that cannot be criticized, so that the opponent will be put to shame without anything bad to say about us… 11  For the grace of God has appeared, saving all 12 and training us to reject godless ways and worldly desires and to live temperately, justly, and devoutly in this age, 13 as we await the blessed hope, the appearance of the glory of the great God and of our savior Jesus Christ, 14 who gave himself for us to deliver us from all lawlessness and to cleanse for himself a people as his own, eager to do what is good. 15 Say these things. Exhort and correct with all authority. Let no one look down on you.

2. Who is responsible for building the home?

3. From whom are we supposed to learn the skills of homebuilding?

a. Do you see this happening in the Church/parish/community? If not, how can we encourage it?

4. What is to be the motivation for our good conduct?

What Does Biblical Homemaking Look Like?

Sirach 4: 20, 29-31

Use your time well; guard yourself from evil, and bring upon yourself no shame. Be not surly in your speech, nor lazy and slack in your deeds. Be not a lion at home, nor sly and suspicious at work. Let not your hand be open to receive and clenched when it is time to give.

Sirach 29: 21-23

Life’s prime needs are water, bread, and clothing, a house, too, for decent privacy. Better a poor man’s fare under the shadow of one’s own roof than sumptuous banquets among strangers. Be it little or much, be content with what you have, and pay no heed to him who would disparage your home;

Proverbs 31:10-31

The ideal wife:

10 When one finds a worthy wife, her value is far beyond pearls.11 Her husband, entrusting his heart to her, has an unfailing prize. 12 She brings him good, and not evil, all the days of her life.13 She obtains wool and flax and makes cloth with skillful hands. 14 Like merchant ships, she secures her provisions from afar.15 She rises while it is still night, and distributes food to her household. 16 She picks out a field to purchase; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.17 She is girt about with strength, and sturdy are her arms.18 She enjoys the success of her dealings; at night her lamp is undimmed. 19 She puts her hands to the distaff, and her fingers ply the spindle. 20 She reaches out her hands to the poor, and extends her arms to the needy.21 She fears not the snow for her household; all her charges are doubly clothed. 22 She makes her own coverlets; fine linen and purple are her clothing. 23 Her husband is prominent at the city gates as he sits with the elders of the land. 24 She makes garments and sells them, and stocks the merchants with belts.25 She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs at the days to come. 26 She opens her mouth in wisdom, and on her tongue is kindly counsel. 27 She watches the conduct of her household, and eats not her food in idleness. 28 Her children rise up and praise her; her husband, too, extols her: 29 “Many are the women of proven worth, but you have excelled them all.” 30 Charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting; the woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 31 Give her a reward of her labors, and let her works praise her at the city gates.

5. Summarize! In today’s terms, what responsibilities should the “ideal” Proverbs 31 wife accept?

For example:

a. What do women at home need to know about finances?

b. What do we need to know about education?

c. What do we care for (vs. 11) that should be a significant duty and focus?

d. What do we need to know about food/nutrition? How difficult is this in

modern day?

e. What about the Proverbs 31 woman must be “strong”?

6. Looking at the two excerpts from Sirach, what do you think a homemaker’s character should be in literal terms according to the Bible?

7. Proverbs 31:27 speaks of the “food of idleness”. What is your idle food in today’s world? How can you overcome the temptation to eat it?

It’s easy to get caught up in the physical nature of being a homemaker:  food, clothing, finances, housecleaning, ETC. Lest we forget that homebuilding is a ministry where we are building people, a domestic church within our walls, let us look at Romans 16:3-5:

Greet Prisca and Aquila, my co-workers in Christ Jesus,who risked their necks for my life, to whom not only I am grateful but also all the churches of the Gentiles; greet also the church at their house.

Paul mentions Prisca and Aquila, a husband and wife who have a “church at their house.” They minister to people from their home, opening their walls and their hearts to bring others to Jesus. Whether we consider the great task of helping our husbands and children get to Heaven someday, or the idea of opening our homes to others and ministering to their hearts by our hospitality, let us consider the task of homebuilding as ministry, as a saving-souls opportunity.

8. What do you do – or would you like to do – to make your home a place where people meet Christ?

The Domestic Church
From “A Mother’s Book of Prayer”
Leaflet Missal Company, St. Paul, MN

Mary, Mother of the Church, your home is Nazareth modeled for us all that is holy, loving, and nurturing about family life. May we use your example to cultivate within our own home a domestic church wherein God’s laws, God’s will, God’s truths guide our lives. Blessed Mother, intercede for our family that we may be a healthy and happy part of the larger Body of Christ. We ask your protection especially in times of turmoil, and are grateful for the many blessings you have gained for us through your prayers. We ask this through your Son, our Lord Jesus Christ, in unity with the Father and Holy Spirit, one God forever and ever. Amen.

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