As a parent, I’m often asked: “How do you teach life skills like cooking, cleaning, or budgeting?“
I love answering that question (because that’s literally my jam!). It’s hard enough for parents to get over their psychological roadblocks and slowwwww down enough to teach tangible skills.
It’s even harder to figure out how to pass on those unteachable life skills to our kids.
You know the ones I mean: grit, perseverance, flexibility, work ethic, resilience. Skills that aren’t about “doing” but about being. They’re not easy to stick on a chore chart or tick off in a curriculum. And yet they’re absolutely essential for helping our kids become thriving adults!
I asked a group of wise parents and entrepreneurial experts what they thought the most important “unteachable” life skill was and how we can actually nurture it. Their answers? Gold. Let’s dive in.
Resourceful Problem Solving, Being Prepared, and Initiative
“Looking around to see what needs to be done and doing it, before someone asks you to do it. 🙂 Invaluable life skill!” –Andrea Davis from Better Screen Time
“One incredibly important unteachable life skill is problem-solving. When kids learn to see problems as opportunities instead of obstacles, they become adults who have healthier relationships, more career opportunities, and are generally less stressed because they have gained confidence and trust in their ability to overcome.” –Lisa Yvonne from The Moments at Home
“A life skill that I try to instill in my kids is to be preparedness-minded. I have included them in our preparedness efforts since they were toddlers. They have tested smoke alarms with me, packed 72-hour kits with me, and helped me taste-test food storage. Every 6 months, we do a “preparedness weekend,” where we review our family emergency plan, as well as things like how to use a fire extinguisher, and how to shut off our utilities. It is so important for them to recognize that their safety is up to them!” –Melanie Papworth from Plan for Awesome
“Stewardship – recognizing that everything we have is God’s and we’re just managing it for Him – might seem like a character trait you either have or don’t. But I’ve watched our children develop this mindset through consistent practice with their three jars. They’re learning that money isn’t just for consuming but for caring for others (giving jar) and planning ahead (saving jar). This perspective shift transforms how they view not just money but everything they’re entrusted with – their time, talents, and relationships. Stewardship creates the foundation for virtually every other financial principle, and when established early, shapes a lifetime of wisdom with resources of all kinds.” –Bob Lotich from Seed Time
“Resourcefulness. Being resourceful is an important skill that allows you to adapt to various circumstances. Sometimes, we don’t have all of the tools or resources to get a job done. But being resourceful allows you to think outside of the box so that a challenge doesn’t become a stumbling block.” –Tori-Ann Mayembe from Real Happy Mom
In our house, we practice this by asking our kids, “What’s another way you could solve this?” instead of immediately offering solutions. It’s a little thing, but it teaches them to think, not just react.
Grit: Teaching Kids to Keep Going
“If I had to pick just one, it would be grit. Grit is the ability to push through when things don’t go as planned—to stick with it, problem-solve, and keep moving forward even when success doesn’t come easy. Every successful person I know—whether in business, sports, or leadership—has had moments where they wanted to quit but didn’t. They pushed through, adapted, and kept going. And that’s what I want all kids to learn—it’s not about never failing, it’s about learning from the process and trying again. That mindset will serve them in everything they do, whether they’re running a business, getting through school, or tackling a big challenge in life. Thanks for the chance to share! I love seeing kids empowered with real skills and real confidence—I can’t wait to see all the incredible things these young leaders will accomplish.” –Bill Brady from Troomi
“Perseverance – understanding that failures are lessons. Rather than accepting failure as our fate, or avoiding certain situations we are afraid of failing in, we learn from our mistakes and do it differently the next time we encounter the same situation. Eventually, persevering through scary situations will change our perspective and enable us to succeed.” –Susan DuPre from Susan Dupre Wellness
“Grit is a foundational life skill that can be trained and strengthened over time. It’s something that helps teens stay with things when they’re hard or boring. Grit will keep them from switching focus constantly and help them reach their dreams.” –Melanie McNally from Destination You
Dr. McNally will be teaching TWO workshops at #LifeSkillsNow Season Four: secrets to motivation for teens and the companion straight to parents: “Helping Your Unmotivated Teen: 3 Steps to Unlocking Their Potential.” Sounds like a winning combination! Register your whole family now—see if you can persevere all the way through entering your email address to get on the roster before something else shiny grabs your attention. 😉
Flexibility: Rolling with the Punches
“I would say flexibility is an important unteachable life skill. Life doesn’t always go as planned, which is something worth teaching kids (and even reminding ourselves) that adapting to what life throws our way is crucial. When I was younger, it was hard for me to break free from perfection and pivot when things don’t go my way, so teaching how to find solutions instead of dwelling on problems is so beneficial. It’s not something that comes naturally, but with practice and patience, it can absolutely be developed.” –Shanice Bannis from City of Creative Dreams
“Flexibility is so essential for all humans. I often praise my kids for being flexible, and telling them when I have to be flexible, and making it a real value in our family.” –Ann Odom from The Reprogramed Parent
“A crucial ‘unteachable’ life skill in finances is delayed gratification—the ability to resist short-term temptations for long-term gains. In a world of instant everything, learning to wait, save, and make intentional choices with money is a game-changer. Whether it’s saving for a big purchase, avoiding debt, or investing for the future, those who master delayed gratification build true financial freedom. It’s not something you can just teach in a single lesson—it has to be practiced and reinforced over time through real-life experiences.” –Brad Nelson from Debt Free Dad
“Flexibility can absolutely be taught, and it’s not even that difficult. It simply requires us listening lovingly and patiently to our children’s frustrations and refraining from trying to calm them, negotiate with them, or distract them.” –Tosha Schore from Parenting Boys Peacefully
“Flexibility is a crucial life skill that can be woven into our workshop. The idea of being flexible with food choices—adding in the good stuff without feeling like you have to give up your favorites—is empowering for kids. It teaches them that being healthy isn’t about perfection but about finding balance. For example, in the “Eat Your Water” mission, kids learn to enjoy their favorite snacks while also including water-rich fruits and vegetables. This approach promotes flexibility by showing them that small changes can lead to big results, both for their skin and their overall health. It’s a lesson in adapting and finding a middle ground, which is a skill they’ll carry into other areas of life too!” –Anu Simh from 9 Arms of Wellness
Be Brave and Curious
“One of the most underrated ‘unteachable’ (but trainable) life skills is curiosity.” –Lisa Yvonne from The Moments at Home
“Courage is so important, especially for neurodivergent kids. The courage to advocate for oneself, to speak up for one’s needs in a polite, respectful manner–that is huge for me.” –Ginny Kochis from Quirky Catholic Kids
Ginny is teaching your kids how to get out of their own way (with courage!) and set and smash goals. She’s in the Neurodivergent Families Track of #LifeSkillsNow, a unique set of workshops that speak to grown-ups or kids (or both!) to help ND families utilize their superpowers and adapt to their weaknesses. Check out the other six topics right here.
Getting Along With Others
“How to Read a Room. As adults, the skill of “reading the room” comes in handy in job interviews, job relationships, social situations, activities, sports, functions, etc. It’s often a subtle thing that is happening naturally (usually with years upon years of hard-won experience behind it). As it becomes second nature for us, we often forget how valuable it might be to people who don’t possess this skill yet.” –Brittany White from The Deliberate Day
“An ‘unteachable life skill’ is treating others like you would like to be treated. What you put out to the world and how you treat others gets returned back to you in every way. We can all open our hearts to love, whether that’s with our inner circle or strangers that we meet for the first time!” –Dr. Bryce Appelbaum from My Vision First
“Teaching kids how to care for animals, big or small, is a great way to nurture their kindness and compassion. By showing them how to use gentle hands, speak in a calm voice, and provide the best care every day, you’re not just raising healthy, happy chickens—you’re also raising thoughtful, caring kids.” –Tracy Lynn from Simple Living Country Girl
Resilience: Raising Sturdy Kids
“Resilience and loving the hard work. I don’t think these are teachable in the traditional sense and instead have to be acquired through experience and through seeing the adults or older teens in their lives have this mindset. Being able to bounce back is a quality we all want to see in our children. They will fail at times, and it’s important they understand the incredible value in failing and the learning that ensues, which helps them build resilience. And, learning to love hard work is also essential. It helps create a positive work ethic, but it also instills the inner sense of purpose instead of relying on outward rewards or other forms of extrinsic motivation.” –Nathalie Curraba
“Resilience is one of the most valuable life skills, especially in woodworking and DIY. Projects rarely go perfectly the first time—you make wrong cuts, parts don’t fit, or you realize you need to start over. Teaching my kids (and even my students) that mistakes are just part of the process helps build resilience. Instead of getting frustrated, I encourage them to figure out a solution, adjust, and keep going—whether in woodworking or life. It’s a skill that helps in everything from learning new tools to facing challenges in school or work.” –Anika Gandhi from Anika’s DIY Life
“Resilience. Entrepreneurship and motherhood both require the ability to keep going even when things don’t go as planned. Resilience is built, not gifted. My kids see this in real-time when I launch a new product, face setbacks, and pivot instead of quitting. I model it when I balance work, care for my home, and still show up when things feel overwhelming. For them, I create small, safe moments of struggle—letting them figure out how to zip their own jackets, solve sibling conflicts, or work through frustration with a task. Resilience isn’t about avoiding failure—it’s about learning to keep moving forward despite it. For my community of mompreneurs, I always remind them: the ability to get up after failing is the most valuable skill in business and life.” –Alexia Ferrari from The Millionaire Homemaker
“Resilience! It’s the ability to bounce back from challenges, failures, or setbacks. While resilience can be strengthened through experiences, it’s not something that can simply be taught like a math problem; it develops through facing adversity, learning from mistakes, and growing through struggles. Music education is the perfect way to help kids learn how to be resilient as they learn to speak and perform the language of music.” –Kathryn Brunner from My Musik at Home
“Emotional resilience is one of the most critical life skills, and while it may seem like something you’re either born with or not, it can absolutely be trained. Most people think their emotions come from their circumstances, but I teach teens that their emotions come from their thoughts about those circumstances. Once they learn how to spot unhelpful thoughts and reframe them using Cognitive Behavioral Techniques (CBT), they gain control over their reactions. Instead of being crushed by failure, social struggles, or setbacks, they bounce back faster. This skill transforms not just how they handle challenges now, but how they approach life’s biggest obstacles in the future.” –Joey Mascio from Sidekick to Hero
And isn’t that the truth? When kids know that they are not defined by their failures but by how they rise, they carry a superpower into adulthood.
Joey is one of our campers’ favorite camp leaders from last year’s Season Three of #LifeSkillsNow, and when you see his teaching style, you’ll know why. My younger boys watched this year’s video on Growth Mindset and actually replayed two parts to see and hear the funny parts again!
Fun fact: Joey was a character actor at Disneyland for nine years. Register to experience his energetic workshop!
Reliability and Showing Up Consistently
“One of the most important ‘unteachable life skills’ is being consistent. You don’t have to be good at something right away—what matters is showing up and taking small steps every day. Little by little, you make more progress than you thought possible! That applies to learning a new skill or working toward a big goal – consistency will get you there.” –Diane in Denmark
“Honesty. Teaching them how to be honest with themselves about who they are in the world and honest with others about who they are. Starting with honesty allows them to build in pride in their core – and pride in how they are different from others, while also knowing they belong.” –Sonali Vongchusiri from Forward Together Parenting
“I think one can learn to be reliable and show up when one promises, but this learning is completely not teachable. You have to go through it yourself to see the consequences of when you don’t show up for someone or aren’t as reliable as you promised you’d be. This is something I haven’t been able to teach. And I’ve had to watch kids make mistakes but learn on their own!” –Shefaly Ravula from Precision Gut Health
Yes! Hand in hand with this one is letting kids feel the consequences of their actions to teach them responsibility. Listen in on this interview to hear more about letting your kids fail…and learn from the experience!
Final Thoughts: How We Grow the “Unteachable”
If these skills sound big, they are.
But you know what? They’re grown the same way anything grows: one little moment at a time.
Here’s what’s worked for us (and what these wise parents confirm):
- Model it yourself (even imperfectly).
- Celebrate effort, not just achievement.
- Tell stories—from your own life, from books, from history—that highlight these traits.
- Let kids fail safely, and coach them through recovery.
- Invite reflection: “What did you learn?” “How did you grow?”
- Be patient. Character growth is slow, but it’s beautiful.
I host a Campfire Circle to kick off each day of #LifeSkillsNow camp June 9-13. My kids and I are silly and goofy and energetic, give a preview of the day, and attempt to teach an “unteachable life skill.” But ultimately, although I’m honored to be on your parenting team along with 70 other experts like the ones you heard from here, it’s the daily practice in your own home that will make the most difference.
At the end of the day, life skills aren’t just about doing tasks. They’re about being someone who can handle life with strength, compassion, and grace.
And that? That’s the ultimate success story.
Let’s keep raising resilient, courageous, empathetic kids, one real-life moment at a time.
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